I Hate You To Death
by V.E. London
Summary: A twist on the classic movie. Neo plays Rosali and Trinity plays Joey. Contains Persephone, violence, and Twins. PG for drug use


The Matrix Reloaded, The Matrix, and all related media, characters, and stories are copyright 1999-2003 AOL Time Warner and Village Roadshow Pictures. The transcript below contains parts of a script written by the Wachowski brothers. This transcript is provided for fans' enjoyment and reference and does not intend copyright infringement. The entire content of this transcript is property of Larry and Andy Wachowski, AOL Time Warner, and Village Roadshow Pictures. No claim is lain on the ownership of the words contained within this transcript on the part of me (V.E. London)  
  
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I Hate You To Death  
  
After the Matrix Revolutions Neo and Trinity decided to go ahead and get married. Because the real world sucked the big one, they moved into the Matrix. That's when all of the trouble started…  
  
To make money, he and his wife opened up a tobacco store. They also owned an apartment building, named after Neo. Neo was happy, and so was Trinity. They needed some more help around the tobacco store, so they hired Persephone (who wound up most unfortunate after the Matrix Revolutions, her entire fall line of Prada shoes and Gucci clothes were completely destroyed, not to mention her house and stuff) to work for them.   
  
Neo was clueless the entire time, but Persephone knew that Trinity had been cheating on Neo with tons of different girls (since Trinity is a man). Persephone tried to tell Neo, but he wouldn't believe her.   
  
Persephone: What if you dreamed that he was cheating on you, and the dream turned out to be true. What would you do?  
  
Neo: I would kill my self. And if I didn't feel any better, I would kill him, I mean her. Yeah, that's what I would do.   
  
A few days later Neo was returning a book to the library (the Sweet November movie script) when he spotted Trinity… with another woman! Neo listened as Trinity flirted with some other woman shamelessly. Neo ran out of the library, very sad and confused. He went home and told Morpheus (who lived with Trinity and Neo as the mother figure) about what happened.   
  
Morpheus: That no good (foreign word), leaves dirty towel everywhere.  
  
Neo: I was a fool mama.   
  
Morpheus: Why not get a divorce?  
  
Neo: Why, so she can go and live with another woman? I would rather he died.   
  
Morpheus: So, ve kill him.   
  
Neo: I hate him mama  
  
Morpheus: I know this boy, he do it. He needs the money  
  
Neo: How do you know these people?  
  
Morpheus: I have many friends.  
  
Neo: Murderers?  
  
Morpheus: Oh, not murderers. He's good boy, very polite.   
  
So Morpheus enlisted the help of a his friend (Link) to kill Trinity. One day, or night I should say, while Trinity was walking to the house, a man in an Agent Smith mask jumped out of the bushes and tried to hit her with a wiffle ball bat. Trinity was caught off guard but managed a good punch to the face. Link ran off as he yelled, "wrong house!"  
  
Trinity called the cops, but since she didn't think that it was actually Agent Smith they wouldn't be able to find the criminal. Morpheus then tried to wire the car so that when Trinity left for work in the morning it would blow up, but that didn't work either. They put 2 bottles of sleeping pills in Trinity's goulash, but she still didn't die! There was only one thing left to do. Call Persephone.   
  
Persephone, who had a really big crush on Neo, would do anything for him. So she came over to the house to try and help. After they explained what needed to be done, they carried the sleeping Trinity upstairs and put her in the bed.   
  
Neo: I don't want you to hurt her, just kill her  
  
Persephone: He won't feel any pain, he'll get a bullet to the head and then that will be it.   
  
Neo: I can't watch this.   
  
He ran from the room and Morpheus followed. A gun shot was heard. Neo and Morpheus ran back upstairs to see that Persephone was standing in the closet and there wasn't a drop of blood on Trinity.   
  
Neo: Did you shoot her?  
  
Persephone: Well, I think so.  
  
Morpheus: What do you mean, you think so?  
  
Persephone: Well, I tried to shoot him, but she's so ugly I just closed my eyes and squeezed off a shot. Suddenly, Trinity started moaning. Neo examined her head and there was a small hole and blood. But she wasn't dead yet. Persephone said that she knew some people who might be useful and she left to go talk to them.   
  
Incognito, Persephone arrived at the 'Gorky's Place' bar. It was in a terrible part of the neighborhood, and a piece of crap. This is what the twins were reduced to hanging out in. They had moved on from weed to crack, and were now locals.   
  
Persephone: Listen, there's something I need you guys to do for me.  
  
1 of the Twins: What?  
  
Persephone: There is a guy, her name is Trinity. I need you to kill her.   
  
Other Twin: How much?  
  
Persephone: Twenty dollars. She's already got one foot in the grave.  
  
1st Twin: Yeah, but it's still MURDER!  
  
Persephone: fine, $40, but that's my final offer. I've already done most of the work.  
  
1st Twin: $60  
  
2nd Twin: Yeah, if we're gonna waist the guy, we might as well get paid to do it. It's not like we're communists or something  
  
1st Twin: Yeah, that's right, I mean, we're Americans  
  
2nd Twin: It's like, the American dream.   
  
Persephone: $41 then.  
  
The Twins whisper a bit  
  
1st Twin: You say it  
  
2nd Twin: (looks at Persephone's chest) Okay  
  
Back at Neo's house, Morpheus, Neo and Persephone are all waiting impatiently for the Twins to arrive.   
  
Neo: Shouldn't they be here by now?  
  
Suddenly, a taxi pulls up and 2 disoriented guys hop out.  
  
Morpheus: is that them?  
  
Neo: How could it be, they came in a taxi. It's not for us.   
  
The Twins are fumbling with something in their pocket. Suddenly one pulls out a cool looking knife and just slits the cab driver's throat. The both start walking off in another direction.   
  
Persephone: Hey, you guys! Where are you going, the house is this way!  
  
The Twins stumble over to where Persephone is waiting for them. Now they're inside of the house…  
  
Persephone: You know, it's not generally considered to be a good idea to take a taxi to the scene of the crime and then slit the driver's throat, leaving the car parked right outside of the crime scene.  
  
Twin 1: Well, it's not generally considered to be a good idea to hire your ex-husband's former body guards to kill the wife of your employer's wife.   
  
Persephone: Whatever  
  
Neo: Would you like something to eat before you, well, before you get started?  
  
Morpheus offers them a piece of half eaten sardine sandwich.   
  
Twin 2: no, thanks. We're cool.   
  
Neo: Persephone, can I speak with you for a minute.   
  
Persephone: Sure  
  
Neo goes over to the living room, away from the Twin's hearing.   
  
Neo: They seem like drug addicts  
  
Persephone: They are drug addicts  
  
Neo: I don't like the idea of having drug addicts in my home  
  
Persephone: Well who did you want me to hire, the Red Cross?  
  
Morpheus: Don't think of them as drug addicts, think of them as killers.  
  
Neo: Alright  
  
Persephone: You can go upstairs now and kill her. It's the far room to the right.   
  
The Twins walked upstairs and in about 1 minute were back downstairs.  
  
Neo: What happened?  
  
Twin 1: We killed it  
  
Morpheus: That quickly?  
  
Twin 1: Slit it's throat. Now, where's our $41? We have an important meeting with our supplier in a few minutes.   
  
Persephone: (cheerfully) here you go boys. Good job.   
  
Neo: Yeah, thanks for getting that bitch off my back. That was great.   
  
There was no trial since no one really missed Trinity. They all lived happily ever after. Neo and Persephone got married, but soon divorced because she was too bitchy. 


End file.
